You Can’t Rise While You’re Still Shrinking to Stay Safe
- Lindsey Cacy
- 5 days ago
- 3 min read

Here’s the thing no one tells you: The parts of you that you’ve been working so damn hard to hide—the ones you’ve labeled as too much, too messy, too emotional—they’re not flaws.
They’re your power.
Yep. That tender, fiery, wild little corner of you that you’ve shoved into the shadows because the world told you it wasn’t “appropriate” or “desirable”? That’s the exact part of you that’s been waiting to lead you home.
And if you’ve been craving a life that actually feels like yours (instead of one long performance), I want you to hear me: Your shadow is not dangerous. It’s the doorway.
Let’s talk about why.
Why You Started Hiding in the First Place
When we were little, we learned real fast that some parts of us weren’t welcome. Maybe your family said, “Stop crying, you’re too sensitive.” Or “Why can’t you be more like so-and-so?” Or you were praised for being the good girl—quiet, agreeable, polite.
So you shoved the loud, emotional, angry, creative, curious parts of you deep down to survive.
It wasn’t your fault. That’s biology. As kids, we’re wired to preserve connection at all costs. So you abandoned parts of yourself to stay safe.
But here’s the plot twist: those rejected parts? They hold your unclaimed power. Your voice. Your softness. Your ambition. Your ability to create a life that doesn’t feel like you’re dying inside.
The Shadow Isn’t Scary—It’s Sacred
Shadow work sounds intimidating, but all it really means is meeting the parts of yourself you’ve been taught to reject. And let me tell you: once you stop performing, you get to exhale.
Like, really exhale.
The day I let myself feel my anger and my grief without judgment was the day I realized: my softness wasn’t weakness. It was strength. Quiet, steady, grounded strength.
A Cheeky Little Shadow Mapping Exercise
Grab a piece of paper (hell, even a napkin will do) and draw a line down the middle.
On the left side, write: What I let the world see
On the right side, write: What I’ve been hiding
Get so fucking real with yourself. No one else is going to see this list.
What parts of you have been hiding because you were told they’re “too much” or “not enough”? What would happen if you stopped hiding her?
Name Her (and Set Her Free)
Now, take that hidden part of you and name her. Is she Angry You? Wild You? Soft You?
Place your hand over your heart, take a deep breath, and whisper to her:I see you. I know you’ve been protecting me. What do you need from me now?
Let her answer. (This requires putting the damn phone down and listening to your body, not your brain.)
Here’s the Tea: You’re Not Broken. You’re Burned Out From Performing.
You don’t need fixing. You need a nervous system that feels safe enough to let the real you come out of hiding.
That’s why I created SOFTEN—my six-week nervous system reset and reclamation program for women who are ready to drop the mask and step into their quiet, but bold power.
We’re not just talking mindset. We’re talking body-level transformation. The kind where you finally stop fawning, freezing, and overthinking—and start living.
Early bird pricing is live now ($100 off until July 16). There are only six spots because I’m keeping this container intimate and potent AF.
If this is tugging at you, that’s not random. You’re ready.
Your Shadow is Your Superpower
The version of you that feels like she’s been playing small, walking on eggshells, and low-key dying inside? She deserves better.
This is your one life. You didn’t come here to perform. You came here to become.
Are you ready to soften into the woman you were always meant to be?
And remember: Your softness and your power are two sides of the same coin. Stop hiding, babe. It’s time.
Comments