A Love Letter to the Moms Who Do It All (and Then Some)

Okay—before we go any further, take a breath. Like actually. Hand over your heart, both hands if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Inhale. Exhale through the mouth like you mean it. There you go.

Now let’s get into it.

As Mother's Day approaches, I had to write a special love letter to my fellow mamas... The women. The do-it-all queens. The ones who are holding it together and holding everyone else too. Whether you're raising tiny humans solo, doing all the invisible labor in a house full of people, or just feeling like you never, ever get a minute to just be—I see you.

It doesn’t have to be Mother’s Day for us to talk about motherhood. Honestly, every damn day is motherhood day when you're the one carrying the mental load for the whole household. Appointments. Groceries. Emotional support. The "Do we need more toilet paper?" telepathy. All of it.

And yes, we love our kids. Yes, we’re grateful. Yes, we’re also fucking exhausted.

I saw a video recently that made me want to cry because it was so real. It said: Check on the one carrying the mental load. And I felt that in my soul. Because are we okay? I mean, yeah… but also, be for real. We’re tired. We’re doing the damn thing, but it’s a lot.

And what makes it heavier? The fact that we’re not really allowed to say that out loud. Like we have to smile through it or risk being seen as ungrateful or dramatic. So we don’t ask for help. We don’t pause. We just keep going. And going. And going.

So let me be the voice in your ear today—the voice note from your bestie that reminds you:

You’re doing enough. You ARE enough. And you deserve support, too.

This one’s for the mom who feels like a single parent in a relationship. For the woman who can’t even imagine dating or seeing her friends because she’s always in “keep everything afloat” mode. For the woman who’s running on fumes and still asking, “Am I doing enough?”

Girl. YES.

Let me be clear: There is no moment where you are not that bitch. Before kids. During the toddler phase. Post-breakdown. Even when you’re doubting yourself. Especially then.

If you need a mantra, let that one be it. Write it down. Tape it to your mirror. Print it on a damn shirt (honestly, I might).

And if you’re in a season where it feels like you’re losing yourself—if motherhood or a draining relationship or just the sheer weight of life is making you forget who you are—this is your permission to come home to yourself.

Because that version of you? The one who dreamed, who danced, who made bold decisions, who remembered her own needs? She’s still in there. She’s just been buried under all the to-do lists and “Mommy, I need you”s and endless life admin.

And listen, I know personal growth talk can get toxic real fast. I’m not here to gaslight you with a cute quote and send you back into the chaos. I’m here to say: You get to be honest. You get to say “I’m not okay” without having to immediately follow it up with “But I’m grateful.” Both can be true. And sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is name the fact that something isn’t working anymore.

You don’t need to have all the answers to start creating change. You just need to tell the truth.

And if your truth today is, “This isn’t it… I don’t know what is, but I know it’s not this”—then sis, that is a win. That’s the first step. That’s the awareness that leads to becoming.

Give yourself credit. Give yourself grace. Make a list of all the things you do. And if you hear a little voice say, “It’s not that much,” know that’s not your voice—that’s a lie you’ve been fed. If you’re a woman, especially a mother, you are doing more than most people will ever see. The world was not built to support us the way we deserve, but that doesn’t mean we don’t need support. Or that we shouldn’t ask for it.

Also: if no one told you this after you had a baby—you deserved more. More care. More time. More space to fall apart and come back together. Postpartum doesn’t have an expiration date. You deserved six months off. You still do. And maybe one day I’ll host a retreat just for that. (Seriously, would you come?)

Until then, let this blog be your reminder. Let this be your “turn the channel” moment. You’re holding the remote. You get to rewrite the plot. If the main character energy is lacking, if the storyline feels like a snooze—change it. Start small. But start.

And while you’re at it, breathe. Touch your heart. Remember who you are. Not who they told you to be. Not who the algorithm rewards. Who YOU are.

Because girl—you’ve always been that bitch.

And you still are.💖

Want more reminders like this? Share this with a mama who needs it. Save it for a day when you forget. And if you’re not already listening to Choose to Become, subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It’s time to become the main character of your story.